Analects 10.22 · Xiang Dang
“When a friend died with no one to take him in, he said, ‘Let the funeral be held at my house.’”
Meaning, context, and how to apply it today
朋友死 無所歸 於我殯 (péng yǒu sǐ, wú suǒ guī, yú wǒ bìn) means “When a friend died with no one to take him in, he said, ‘Let the funeral be held at my house.’” It is a passage from the Analects of Confucius, Book 10 (Xiang Dang), Chapter 22.
朋友死 無所歸 於我殯
- Pinyin
- péng yǒu sǐ, wú suǒ guī, yú wǒ bìn
- Translation
- When a friend died with no one to take him in, he said, ‘Let the funeral be held at my house.’
- Source
- Analects, Book 10 (Xiang Dang), Chapter 22
What does this passage mean?
The twenty-second chapter of Xiang Dang records an action of Confucius. When a friend died and there were no relatives to take charge of the body, Confucius offered to have the funeral at his own house. The key character refers to keeping the body in state until burial. Taking on another person’s death in one’s own home was a heavy responsibility even then. The record goes on to say that when friends sent gifts, even ones as valuable as carriages and horses, he did not bow unless the gift was sacrificial meat. He was unmoved by receiving valuable things from friends and unstinting in taking care of a friend’s end. The scene shows in action what friendship is.
How can we apply it today?
The depth of a friendship shows not in good times but when the other person is in the greatest difficulty. Celebrations draw crowds; hard tasks thin them out. Confucius made the final care of a friend whom no one else would take in his own responsibility. How long we stay beside a friend in a long hospital stay, a colleague whose business has failed, or an acquaintance in mourning is the true weight of a relationship. Unmoved in the exchange of gifts, unstinting in hard moments: that is the order of friendship Confucius showed. It makes us ask how many friends we could be a place of return for.
Questions to reflect on
- ·Who stayed beside you in your hardest moments?
- ·How much do you share in other people’s hard tasks?
- ·Is there someone for whom you could be a place to return to?
Character-by-character breakdown
| Character | Pinyin | Meaning | Strokes | Radical |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 朋 | péng | friend | 8 | 月 (moon) |
| 友 | yǒu | friend | 4 | 又 (again) |
| 死 | sǐ | die | 6 | 歹 (death) |
| 無 | wú | lack | 12 | 火 (fire) |
| 所 | suǒ | that which | 8 | 戶 (door) |
| 歸 | guī | return | 18 | 止 (stop) |
| 於 | yú | at; in | 8 | 方 (square) |
| 我 | wǒ | I; me | 7 | 戈 (halberd) |
| 殯 | bìn | lay in a coffin | 18 | 歹 (death) |
Frequently asked questions
Q. What does “When a friend died with no one to take him…” mean?
朋友死 無所歸 於我殯 (péng yǒu sǐ, wú suǒ guī, yú wǒ bìn) means “When a friend died with no one to take him in, he said, ‘Let the funeral be held at my house.’” It comes from the Analects, Book 10 (Xiang Dang), Chapter 22.
Q. Where does this passage appear in the Analects?
It is Analects 10.22: Book 10 (Xiang Dang), Chapter 22.
Q. How can this teaching be applied today?
The depth of a friendship shows not in good times but when the other person is in the greatest difficulty.Celebrations draw crowds; hard tasks thin them out.